My little Rory has been in this world for three whole weeks today! It is insane how quickly that time has gone, how much he has changed, how much I have changed! I feel like there is so much stuff online about having a baby, pregnancy and looking after a baby but I want to talk about me and what it has been like to be a mum the past three weeks...
1. Obvious one but I am so tired! For the first two and a half weeks Rory slept so well and we felt so lucky! He typically went to sleep at 12pm and slept till 9am waking up every three hours for a feed and not being too hard to put back down. The last few days however, he hasn't slept a wink. Not much during the day and virtually nothing at night, we think he has a touch of colic or reflux maybe. But its been hell.
2. Breastfeeding is hard but not for the reasons you'd think. He feeds really well and is gaining weight perfectly but I'm finding the restrictions it imposes really hard. I feel like every time we go out it is a constant worry about him getting hungry and having to try and find somewhere suitable to feed him. The cluster feeding is killing me as well, I just feel like I have no time to do anything because I am constantly glued to the sofa feeding. I also find it so frustrating that its all down to me, unlike bottle feeding, I can't share the task. I know this all makes me sound selfish but its just how I'm feeling right now!
3. For the first time in my life, I want to do housework but can't! Every time I try and get anything done in the house, he needs feeding and I'm sofa bound again. How does so much mess get made when we never leave the sofa?!
4. I feel like my body is falling apart, I am still taking blood pressure medication for the foreseeable future, I was having to be injected at home for 8 days after birth and then about a week ago I had a mysterious allergic reaction! My whole body was covered in hives, I was itching like crazy and looked awful. I also developed an ear infection that was the most painful thing on earth. I am feeling a bit better now but it was a stressful time.
5. I'm not gonna lie, there has been a few times when I haven't changed my knickers for a few days because i've just completely forgotten, not cleaned my teeth and worn the same clothes for a week. I don't have the time!
6. Another breastfeeding woe has been the leaking! I can't stand it, I constantly smell like gone off milk, my bras are always soaked. I have recently found a solution in the form of Breast Shells which as like plastic cups that you put over your nipples to collect milk. I leak the most when feeding from the other breast so when I fed I put a shell on the other one to catch the leaks. It is insane how much comes out just during one feed!
7. I have loved having all the visitors coming to meet our little bundle of joy but it has meant that there wasn't much time to nap when the baby napped. I have felt like I'm running on nothing for ages!
8. My poor pup, Watson has been such a dream and taking to being a big brother so well but I miss him so much! I feel like our quality time together has been taken away, I desperately want a 4 hour nap just me and him so we can cuddle like old time. Fat chance of that though!
9. Everything is a constant worry, for some reason, I am super paranoid about his temperature. I feel like I'm always trying to figure out how many layers he needs and if he's warm enough at night. Constantly checking he's not too chilly. Probably due to the fact he needed to be under a heat lamp for a night in the hospital so subconsciously I feel like he's cold all the time.
10. Overall though, I know this probably all sounds like me complaining but I am loving being a mum. Rory is such an amazing little person already with such a big personality.
He really does make it all worth it!
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